November 2019 – The Cabbage Patch

Review: Pittsburgh Barbecue Company

Pittsburgh Barbecue Company

Delmont, PA

I have a rule when it comes to BBQ. Like this blog, it is both arbitrary and specific. If you are offering BBQ and you have a pig with a chef’s hat on your sign I’m stopping. Setting aside the implied cannibalism/sadism (and I am), this has proven to be a short-hand for good BBQ in my experience with one really notable failure.

Pittsburgh Barbecue Company does a lot of things very well, but they don’t fly the Bat Signal (Pig Signal?) as an indicator of their excellent wares, and as such, I passed their Delmont location several times before Mrs. Slaw suggested that we stop. While all their food is good, this is as yet not a general food blog, I will spare you my feelings on the larger menu and give you Slawheads what you are here for- a review of their slaw.

Cabbage: They use both green and red cabbage in their mix and it’s always still crisp which is welcome

Carrot: Ample

The Cut: They go with my preferred thick cut on the veggies

Dressing: They don’t overdo it. I usually stir the container a bit to make sure everything is covered, but flavor is excellent.

Salt and Pepper: Pepper apparent visually and on taste. They are probably one of the only places that put as much pepper on it as I like, and where I got the idea to finish my batches with additional coarse ground pepper.

Spice/Seasonings: Nothing worth noting

Overall Thoughts: This is my current gold standard for creamy slaw in the western PA area. They nail multiple important aspects and nothing is lacking. These are family-size portions served out of a resealable plastic container and are very generous. So generous I’ve had to save my cornbread side for later on one more than one occasion and I love cornbread. They put the whole kernels of corn in the cornbread. I love that. (Note to self: If this venture fails, I should start a new cornbread blog. Will need to change my name to Colonel Corny).

If you are driving by this location and are on the other side of the divided highway, it’s worth a u-turn to get this stuff.

Grade: A

Review: Long John Silver’s

Location: Irrelevant

The good and bad of chains is consistency. This is why drive-thru coffee is burnt everywhere you get it. Over-roasted beans produce a uniform, consistent cup. One of the great victors in consistency of experience is fast food restaurants. A Big Mac is a Big Mac everywhere. Long John’s Cole Slaw is no different. Despite the limitations of the form, they actually do an ok job.

Cabbage: They use two different kinds in my experience, as there are both light and dark green pieces every time I have ordered their cole slaw. There is also onion present which I’m not crazy about.

Carrot: They have the cabbage to carrot ratio just about perfect

The Cut: This is the biggest negative.

Without the option to hand-cut, they dice the veggies into small cubes/rectangles. This solves the problem of having soggy produce. While I’m sure the stuff moves quickly, I’m under no illusion they are prepping this more than a handful of times a day. Small-cut pieces don’t hold dressing well, however, and as a result, if a good amount of dressing is present, it will be leftover when you are done eating your bowl like cereal milk, except way less appealing.

Dressing: Dressing is fine. I’m assuming it’s coming from some sort of bag, and it’s non-objectionable.

Salt and Pepper: Maybe a touch salty. I usually add pepper.

Spice/Seasonings: Meh

Overall Thoughts: This is fine.

Really, it’s fine.

Especially because some of the other LJS side options are nasty. I do love me some crumblies, but the thought of paying for extra crumblies is a bridge too far. In a perfect world, I’d skip this altogether and get lunch from Popeye’s but the reliability and speed of my local Popeye’s drive-thru makes every trip there an adventure. Not in the fun way, but in the “we’re lost in the woods after dark and I only have a few handfuls of cashews, no water and a compass that I have no idea how to use” kind of way.

Grade: C- for cromulent.

The Quest for the Perfect Recipe, Batch#2: When Life throws out your lemons…

This time I only got two steps in before remembering to take pictures

Basic Recipe I followed:

The basic recipe was equivalent to Batch #1 but I decided I would go ahead and create a Miracle Whip-based batch to consider Mrs. Slaw’s advice. I know Mrs. Slaw’s mother’s recipe uses Miracle Whip, so I knew there was a difference from eating it but wasn’t sure how drastic it would be. Since we needed to take an item to a Saturday cookout it was the perfect chance to get some feedback on my recipe from people who aren’t related to me by marriage. If it was bad, I figured I could pass it off as stolen from a hobo on the drive over. In retrospect labeling it Batch #2 was probably a poor choice for that ruse. Deliberate labeling shows the kind of forethought you don’t see from the average hobo.

Ingredients used:

Miracle Whip= This stuff is visually gross just like Mayo. It is sweeter.

Vinegar= Walmart Apple Cider Vinegar

Salt= Morton’s

Sugar= Unlabeled clear bin from kitchen pantry, again

Pepper= From the grinder on the kitchen table

Cabbage= Source: Dilner Farms CSA. Used about 3/4 a medium head. I hand cut with a sharp chef’s knife.

Carrot= Most of one large. I learned cutting the thin side off before using the box grater made it a little easier to work with the carrot.

Lemon juice= None (See Unintentional deviations from Recipe).

Photos:

Intentional deviations from Recipe:

Coarse Black pepper added to finish and for visual effect. That stuff is expensive.

Unintentional deviations from Recipe:

The lemons I had used in Batch# 1 were gone by now. This created a dilemma. Short on time (and too lazy to go buy lemons), I was forced to improvise. I added another 50% to the desired amount of Apple Cider Vinegar to make up for it. It seemed to be a reasonable workaround. Unfortunately, it did introduce a second variable when I was trying to make Batch#2 as close to #1 as possible.

Beer accompaniment:

Fathead’s Head Hunter. Pretty much a perfect West Coast IPA and a good sipper while making slaw.

Beer accompaniment’s potential box-grater finger injury rating (BAPBFIR):

2.5 bloody fingers out of 5.

How I felt:

I made this and took it to a cookout the same day so this batch did not have the benefit of being allowed to rest. I thought it was better on initial taste than batch #1, and decidedly less bland.

How others felt:

The batch was a little small for the number of guests at the party, so it was gone quickly. I heard neither positive nor negative feedback from other guests but I take the disappearing as a positive sign. Pulled pork was served so people were adding it to their sandwiches.

Grade:

I- for Incomplete. I didn’t get to try enough of it to make a full opinion and the fact I was a little buzzed at the cookout dinner didn’t help. I was hoping I could rule out whether I should consider Miracle Whip in the future, but will need to try it at least once more.